my feelings

sorry that i went into ur blog n post again.. hope u dun mind coz this blog belong to us in the first place..

em.. u noe tt im feeling v pressurized, tong ku n stress n i had no time to tell u everyting in face or by fone so iid to post it here..im currently nt feeling v well, i kept having negative thoughts, scared tt i will really lose u 1 day or u will forget abt mi n our love.. tis 3mth i have nt been happy at all u noe tt.. i suffering in silence n i had so much fan nao..last time u will be my listening ear n support but now i had nth.. all is kept inside my heart.. u shld noe how painful is tt..i do nt noe u r really happy now or juz wan to move on without mi but to mi i tried v v hard.. i still cant move on with my life n im feeling more hurt everytime when time passed.. maybe i feel tt e more time goes by my chaance will be slimmer. i noe i keep talking abt all this shit whenever we meet or chat n make u feel v stress n insecure but tis is nt my fault i cant help it.. i'm worried tt if i stop saying tos ting u will feel tt i had get over le n i cant be wif u liao n i'll lose all my chance n hope.. i really v v scared abt tis thing..

i noe u kept avoiding mi becoz u dun wan gif mi hope but this make mi even more hurt.. i do not noe how much i mean to u now but i feel tt im lik nth to u n this make mi more depressed.. i had told myself not to tink abt it n i tried v hard but i felt even worse this way.. i dun feel like going on seperate way wif u n i cant..u may tink tt im useless or not man or wat but do u noe tt how much i love u..i hate myself alot for behaving this way too but there is nth i can do! memories wif u juz keep flashing in my mind.. i shed every nite whenever i close my eye to sleep..

i noe u r nt those heartless girl.. i noe u dun wan to see mi liddat oso rite..pls ans my call n reply my msg coz everytime i cant reach u it made mi go crazy.. u shld noe e feeling lor.. i cant reach u n yet i cant do anything except keep calling or msg.. i noe tis kind of behavour is like a pest hope u dun blame mi la coz i really care..

pls pls.. give us a chance to try things out again.. i may be selfish to request for this coz is im e one who cant get over n want u to gif in now.. i dun request much la.. not asking u to patch wif mi rite now.. i onli wan u to treat mi e way like b4 by msging n call mi often, chat wif mi abt ur prob or gossip n joke n play wif mi lor.. coz u lik v serious n dun feel talking to mi whenever we chat n juz want to hang up e fone faster.. i dun mind waiting for u for mths n yrs to accept mi again but try to rem to stay as close as possible to mi..

last time we r so sticky u still rem.. we stick tog everyday.. we had such good memories n happy days in e past.. had u ever recall e life tog wif mi? is happy or sad u shld noe compare to ur life now w/o mi.. u sure u do not wan back ur life wif mi? without any stress n having a bf to care n pamper u, bringing u around solving ur prob, fetching u n alway be by ur side? i noe tt u still haf feeling for mi pls dun hide it can.. everytime i ask whether u still love or miss mi u say duno.. coz u r unsure.. u do not want to gvef mi hope n u urself duno wat u want too rite.. u're worried tt if u come back to mi u'll lose all ur feedom now. or its that u do not wan to be wif mi anymore but u scared u will hurt mi or regret next time.. i duno if i'm rite but this is what i feel.. but i can assure tt i will trust u more n wont be too possessive toward u. i will be more mature. i onli want to have ur love..

i really hope tt we can remain close like before like a couple at e moment and in the meantime u can go tink if i'm really the one who u can love n trust n give u secure.. at least tis way i will feel better n i wont talk abt those things n u wont feel stress oso.. then as time goes by if u feel that u dun love mi at all le we still can be gd frenz ma den i wont feel so sad coz i oso see the effort u put in.. rite? u ustd wat im trying to say? this is e best soultion to us i tink.. haha.. sorry.. im like writing a story.. hope u will read it n rem it.. coz everytime i talk to u, u like choose to forget de..haahaa